Friday, May 31, 2013

A Prissy Kitty Tickled Pink

Meowllo Efurryone, I imagine you are wondering about the title of this week’s blog. Here’s the scoop, I, Me, My Prissy Self,  Juliet named it see my brofur is sleeping so me grabs the puter, climbs under the sofa so the light won’t wake him, and me is trying to be very quiet so he won’t hear me and take over the puter like he always does.,

Me wanted to talk about kitty communication as we kitties all know  kitties communiate better than pawsably any living thing on the planet I means purreal we volcalize, we use our tail to communicate, our eyes, our ears, our noses, our mouth and even our belly after all we have to roll over to show them where to rub.

When me meow  me could be saying "Hey, how ya doin'?”, it could be a command like "I want up, I want down, More food now", it could also be an objection "Touch me at your own risk", or we could be making an announcement like "Here's your mouse".

Mes even walk around the house meowing to myself which drives the humom batty, she talks to herself all the time so what’s the big mew!

We make many other sounds that humans don’t understand but I won’t discuss them in detail as we could be in mixed company a hooman could be reading over your shoulder in an attempt to learn our secrets.

So we’ll just list them cause you guys know what they all mean!

Chirps and trills,  purring, growling, hissing, spitting, yowl, howl, chattering, chittering,  and twittering (no not Tweeting on Twitter).

Our humom has been bragging to hers hooman friends that Lennon and me is getting along purrfectly because what she does not notice is our body language. Lennon can be very annoying like I imagine most little brofurs can. The humom does not read our body language just like she does not know as much as she thinks she does about the sounds we make.

        “Juliet where are you, do you have MY computer?

Oh poo it’s Lennon he is awake and screeching at me like he is my boss or something.

“Yes, I have OUR computer Lennon take a chill pill and stop being rude I am wrinting in OUR blog.”

Well kitties me guess the blissful silence is katput since me brofur  is awake and being intrusive.

Meollow it’s Lennon the Meowravlous here guess what me woke up and found dat Juliet had stoled MY laptop and me is MAD! I have to share MY humom (aka the slave), MY litterbox, MY food, and MY toys with her but I am putting my paw down at this continued disrespect where MY laptop is concerned.

“Do you hears what me is saying Juliet? You are NOT to touch my laptop without me pawmission is that clear?”

What was her telling everypawdy? I bet it was some dumb girly stuff, yucky! Just saying that leaves a bad taste in my mouth.

“Lennon I was not telling them anything girly and it was not dumb I was talkin to dhem about the way we kitties vocalize so well and was about to say sumfing about kitty body language which is sumfing you should understand very well since I have to use it so much to keep you from being such a pesky paw!”

Well that’s a relief to me and I am sure it is to you MY readers too but I am pawsitive that Juliet was not as accurate as I am so I will take over on this subject.

I think instead of talking about our body language we should be focusing on what we should teach da humans that we are sharing OUR homes with.

“Lennon you are just being silly how are da hoomans gonna be able to use somfing they don’t have?”

“Juliet what you screeching about now?”

“Lennon da hoomans don’t has tails so how are they ganna let anypawdy know if they are happy, mad, or scared?”

Purrs, what to do about that? Oh wait! I got it since the hoomans have arms and legs but not tails maybe we could teach them to use their arms or legs like we kitty cat's use our tails.

Them can hold their arm straight above thems head like we kitty cats does when all is good that will look kinda like a cats tail.

“Lennon I have one way da humans can use dheir arms let me type something on OUR puter to post on the bloggie.”

“OMC,  Juliet it is a BLOG not a bloggie, okay here but be fast and make it short you are not taking over MY blog.”

If da hooman is content they cans hold their arm out with the tip of one finger curved down, like we do with our tails.

“Wow I hab to admit that’s not too bad Juliet now give me MY laptop back bepaws it’s MY turn again.”

“Okay Lennon here you are suches a poop head.”

If da hooman is scared they can take their hands and make their hair all wild and bushy and then just stands up straight that would look like us  kitty cats when we puff our tail out to tell da hooman okay we warned you so keep it up if you want me to scratch the skin off your face.

        “You are just trying to make hoomans look silly now Lennon.”
“Juliet, them does not need any help in that department they manage that all by themselves.”

However, can you kitties imagine how funny a hooman would look down on their hands and knees rubbing their heads against the recliner to leave thems scent or if other hoomans got down like that smelling of the recliner. MOL!

“I have a queshion Lennon hoomans does not have the ability to move their ears the way we kitty cats do.”

“You think I does not know that Juliet.”

I would never admit it to her but she is right so that can be our topic next week me will think reals hard about this defect in da humans ears.

We hopes efferyone has a pawsitivily wonderpurr week!

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